Nice guys don't always finish.

Sorry, long time no post.

I've spent the past couple months busy as a ever. Lots of work. Lots of hanging out to distract me from work. Lots of thinking.

I've realized that I am rather content and appreciative right now of where I'm at. I'm thankful for being young, having good friends, having a sales job that doesn't pay on commission, having what I need and a few things I want, and having my personality. For someone who grew up with ADHD, I'm totally shocked at the amount of patience I have with people. I can take disgruntled customers, confusing management, and social drama all on the same day (and for days at a time) and still be able to smile. I'm still an extremely fortunate person. However, now that things are coming to a steady pace, I'm at the point where I find myself occasionally wondering what it is that I really want. I thought I set those goals and crossed them off the list.

I realized that I want a couple more things. One, I want to know what I really want to do for a job. Every time I think about it, it always comes back to a position similar to my mentoring position in the youth program. Helping youth figure out what they need to do in order to do what they want was the most rewarding job I ever had (and the shittiest pay.) But, that's something I have plenty of time to figure out. The other thing is what a lot of my friends and folks my age are finding... a relationship. I didn't realize until the other day that it has been almost 4 years since I had a steady girlfriend! It doesn't help when your roommate has one either and they're in the early puppy love months. I've looked around a bit in the network I have established. Girls still seem to be in to guys who have a lot of asshole in them and they just regret later. That's fine, that's normal for a lot of people.

To me, that just says I'm looking at the wrong girls. I kick myself every time I think of the really awesome girls I passed up or dropped the ball on in the past few years. At the same time, I think it's because I just didn't quite have the confidence that a girl needed to see. Confidence is a double-edged sword. Important thing to remember: if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone, what's another few months of finding them?

Fidelity? Was that a band from the 60s?

Before I write this blog. Let the record show that this is not about you, yes, you, sitting in the back row picking your nose while texting. (Great bit for opening credits of any movie.) This is a reaction to the general unbound and licentious (thanks dictionary.com) behavior of our generation's below-the-belt area.

After having worked at a popular night club as a bouncer for several months, I got to go undercover in to the world of skanks, snitches, and hos as well as players, pimps, and douchebagss. And one thing I've realized is that half of these people are actually respectful and decent people in every other aspect of their life besides their more-than-just-a-friendship-ships. They work hard, love their families, are involved in their community, and give generously to the United Way. Butt, they cheat.

I know, I sound like Brother Bartish on his freshly whitewashed pulpit spitting on those in the first 3 rows. Believe me, I'm not judging. These people aren't married. Well, except for the girl Alex made out with the other night. She was married and rich. What I'm trying to say is that cheating just ain't right. It's a big fuck-up that can fuck things up a lot. The first and most obvious reason is that people have to think about you orangutang-bangin someone else. Second, that person's trust in relationships is shot for a good while. And third, it can start wars. (i.e. Trojan War (which may have lead to the invention of the condom in which case cheating has lead to one good thing))

Whether it's the cheater, the cheatee, or the person who is being cheated with, we have all been there or will all be there at some point or another. It seems about as commonplace in our generation now as slap bracelets were to the 80s or freezer pops to the 90s.

Fuck yeah, freezer pops. Fuck yeah!

Nothing's Easy...

So, it is July 16 and Mackadocius and I get keys to the house in 10 days. The house is in Price Hill in Cincinnati right by St. Williams' Church. Sweet 3 bedroom home with a nice front porch, good backyard, fresh paint inside and out, AND, since it's our old boss' house, it comes with a kegerator. McKenzie will be my roommate. He has been one of the longest running close friends of mine. We dated identical twins in high school, so, needless to say, we hung out. It's gonna be sweet. The lease starts on Aug.1, so we should be able to get everything moved in a week. HA!

Any-whiz, it's nice to be getting close to reaching a big goal. Although moving in to a rented house is not a big deal to most people after college, it symbolizes a lot to me. As soon as I found out that I got the job at ERAC, I set up a bunch of things I wanted to get accomplished before the end of the year...

1. Buy a laptop.
2. Buy a car.
3. Buy a new phone.
4. Budget my bills
5. Save some money.
6. Move the fuck out.

I figured that these goals would have to happen in this order for things to go smoothly. I have busted my ass for the past 5 months to make this happen. And it's happening. And that kicks ass. And I kick ass. But, what kicks my ass? The answer is bills and bullshit. Money, that is. I have never been one that was great at budgeting, but I have really had to focus on it in order to move out. And, yet, no matter how much I try to cut back on everything, the money is just tight as shit every week.

And I hate that. That was the one thing I said I didn't want to have to stress about when I graduated. I wanted to be able to afford the simple pleasures in life. Turns out, the simple pleasures are $4/gallon and $30/night. I have gotten really nervous about being able to pay rent and utilities with how tight I've seen things been. The biggest reasons have been large expenditures for the past few months.
:
Mastercard commercial: Car Break-in: $600. Lease Security Deposit: $340. 2 In-state trips: $300. Dad's b-day gift: $100. Lighting a shot on fire while it was IN my mouth: priceless (actually that cost plenty the next morning hooooh!)

Basically, I'm not leaving Cincinnati until New Years for a big family cruise, during which I will be paid. ..........bitchin.

Goals for the next 12 months.

1. Make the new house stylin.
2. Turn the garage in to a "Man Cave."
3. Brush up on my guitar.
4. Date more
5. Get promoted.
6. Get transferred to Chicago.

P.S. The title of this blog was actually what one of my customers repeated over and over to me. She was 71. I figured that made it count as words of wisdom.

What I've learned in a year.

It has been one year since I graduated from school. People always say in moments like these "Wow, this past year has just absolutely flown by." It's usually because they are either enjoying their time so much that they don't want it to end or because they have not done much or both. I have never been a big fan of this saying. Yes, time goes by and, before you know it, things are totally different. Yet, what has really changed? Small things that seem big like jobs, friends, living situations, weather, and cup size vary with time. However, big things that seem small like self-image, friendships, and goals for the future only become more solidified and strong.

For me, this is true. I am on my fourth job in a year, confirmed and rejected several people as friends, gone through all four seasons, signed a lease, and moved from a B to an A cup. However, I really like and respect the person I am more. I have really learn to show my appreciation for friends I have. And I have, probably for the first time in my life, set goals that are realistic and acheivable to me.

I absolutely miss a ton of stuff about the life I had in college. Being surrounded by wonderful people does a lot for your confidence and self-esteem. However, it is because of that life that I am able to reaffirm myself whether or not I have that safety blanket. I could go on and on about what I've learned over the past year, but that would be kind of rude to dominate the conversation. But, wait!!! This is a blog, you can stop reading whenever. So, fuck it. Here we go...

"What I've learned in a year."
1. I suck at blogging
2. Clubbing can be fun.
3. Clubbing can get really old.
4. Working at a bar can turn in to a really sad career.
5. Sales is an evil necessity.
6. You have to practice Spanish in order to speak it.
7. Listening is important.
8. Good advice is simply that. Good advice. It doesn't mean people will do what you recommend.
9. Living at home with your parents does not boost your confidence.
10. Drinking beer on a river is a great thing to do with friends.
11. Listening to trees move is relaxing.
12. Frisbee golf is better than normal golf.
13. Regular golf is not completely terrible.
14. Getting kicked in the ass could result in getting kicked in the balls.
15. Wine is the best alcohol ever.
16. Cats are cool.
17. Dogs are more fun than cats.
18. It's harder to quit an easy job than it is to keep a hard job.
19. There is less time to listen to music and even less money to buy it after college.
20. I like insurance underwriting.
21. I hate being pressured to sell.
22. Goodwill has cool clothes.
23. Working at a bar or in a warehouse will make you reevaluate your life.
24. Good credit is important.
25. A good bed is crucial.
26. Vegans have a point as well as meat eaters.
27. Don't ever get pregnant on accident.

Why I didn't go to church...

So, for those of you who don't know me that well, I was born, baptized, and raised Catholic. I attended 12 years of Catholic education. All growing up, I went to mass every Sunday with my parents and sisters. Around the age of 17 or 18, I decided that I would decide on my own when and where I would like to worship the Lord. Needless to say, my parents were dissappointed and angry that I chose not to go to mass with them every Sunday now. (To be honest, waking up at 8AM on your day off sounds absurd regardless of what age you are.) I explained to my parents that I was not renouncing my faith, I was just customizing the way I wanted to worship.

However, that was several years ago. What has not changed is my mom asking me if I want to go to mass with her every week. Granted, since I'm Catholic, I'm already predisposed to a life of guilt, but I do feel guilty when I tell her no. A lot has happened in the past few years to encourage me to get closer with my faith. My very very Catholic Grandma passed away and one of her dying wishes was for me to pass out her "One Bread, One Body" books which are basically monthly sermons. Also, the amount of stress I've been having since I graduated would really be alleviated with some spiritual peace.

Anyways, back to the main title of this blog. Why I didn't go to church today. Every day, there is a different reason. Today I was washing my new car. Last week I was over at a friend's house. Most of the time, however, the reason is b/c I'm tired or I just don't feel like it. I do feel guilty for what I feel is turning my back on my maker. I have a lot to be thankful for and I need to start doing some thanking.

So, I declare my new goal for the next month. I will go to confession, to try to absolve myself and my conscience and go to mass at least every other week.

P.S. I'm listening to B.B. King right now and I would be a lot more motivated to go to Church if we had someone like him playing our music.

Ohh, so you're life's this busy too?

I got to kick it with some of the other new old kids this past weekend. They are members of the group I commonly refer to as "my OU friends." Long story short, they are my friends from OU.

Visiting with them made me realize that a quarter-life crisis is similar in some ways to battling an addiction. Misery loves company. We all talked about our jobs and about our new and realistic plans for the future of moving, buying real-estate, working one's ass off. For some reason, it gave me comfort knowing that my friends are just as happy and miserable with their new lives as I am. None of us looked forward to getting up early every day to work a 10-12 hour shift. However, we are all surprised with how much we don't mind it. Plus, the little bit of money you have coming in to pay for all those drinks you couldn't afford in school and/or everything else you couldn't afford in school either makes it a little more tolerable.

Now, the tough part is just figuring out how fast and in what direction your road trip through life is going. (Copyright Pending 04/08/2008 11:34 PM)

P.S. It was freaking sweet seeing Dan, Lo, and Mikey Boy.
Dan, you are just so much more amazingly conversational and I wish we had talked more while we were living together.
Lo, you buying a house is sweet. You not looking for the server password b/c of us making fun of you was not.
Mike, you're still just as god-damn ridiculous as I left you. You paid more for a kool-aid with a fruit salad (Sangria) than I did for a glass of good wine. And Olive Garden is a terrible idea before you drink.

My plain ol' I-still-think-about-you-sometimes-post-break-up blog

There is a 99.47% that you will never read this or even know it was written. This is because we haven't talked in a long time. But, I thought you should know that I still think about you everyday. I wonder if you think about me too... every time I think about you.

I'll be honest and say I'm better off now that we're done, but I'll tell the truth and say it doesn't always feel that way. If you tear/break any muscle in the human body, you will have to be more careful with it the rest of your life. It will need more attention. The heart is the most important muscle in the body.

First love, puppy love, young love. Whatever they want to call it, they always say its rough the first time. To me, it was true love... at least on my end.

Stupid stuff reminds me of you and it makes me sad that we're not still friends, even though that was my decision. To be very honest, I'd absolutely love to see you call, ...but I don't know if I could answer.

Love,
Davey Boy.

P.S. I think excerpts from this post may be taken and used as lines in a shitty summer date-movie. I better get some royalties.